Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Dear Lara, today you're 4.

Today, you're 4.

I can hardly believe it.  I realize every mom says that...but honestly, I can't. You're turning into a beautiful soul right before my eyes. 

To be transparent, this past year has had it's challenges. But that's to be expected with three, right? I was told that a million times, but I didn't believe it. 

I brushed off all those moms who came before me, telling myself they had it all wrong.  That all the tantrums, emotions and epic meltdowns would end the moment you transitioned from 2 to 3. 

Well, I was wrong.  But, like most things in motherhood, aren't we always?  We live and learn everyday, all the while our little ones steadfastly, blindly loving us while we navigate this whole motherhood gig. 

And you, my daughter, are no different. I remember when you were a baby, trying to get you to smile for pictures.  You stared me down with this solemn look on your face, rarely smiling and never when I asked, of course. It drove me crazy!  I remember being concerned, wondering how I'd raise this quiet, serious spirit of a child...

Each year that passes, I embrace & adore every ounce of the little lady you are. 

You are analytical, always nervous in new places and situations. You sit back, typically clinging to my leg, taking it all in. It used to be hard for me to watch you be fearful of new things, but I've grown to admire that about you.  

You are very different from I, very quiet and shy until you feel comfortable with the new people around you. As you grow into a young woman, I know this trait will protect your heart. You've taught me so much in your short, 4 years of life. You've taught me patience, Lord have you taught me patience. You've taught me to forgive.  But most of all, you've taught me a love I never knew before you.

I remember the moment you were born as if it was yesterday. I can still smell your sweet, soft skin as your daddy held you up to my lips so I could kiss your tiny, little face. You were stubborn from the start, breech and not budging, so a c-section it was. I laugh about it now, because this scheduled, planned labor was exactly how you would've wanted it. 

You like plans. You like routine. You like to always know what's coming.  

You also LOVE shoes, especially mine.  You have mastered the art of walking in heels, heels that are 10 sizes too big, mind you.

And makeup. And purses, oh do you love purses.  

Everywhere we go, you ensure you have a matching purse filled to the brim with your horsey bracelet, pretend credit card and teal Moana flip phone.  And your sunglasses, the hot pink sunglasses. Those are never, ever left behind. 

What can I say, you love your accessories. I have no idea where you get that from. #guilty

Watching you become a big sister has been my biggest joy.  You are gentle with her, even when she is screaming because she wants the baby doll that YOU have.  Not one of 800 baby dolls sitting right next to her. 

You are wise beyond your years, understanding that she wants what you have because she adores you. She looks up to you and everything you are.  And why wouldn't she?  

You, my little love, have a heart of gold. 

As you grow up, I hope you always...always remember, that everyday I get to spend with you is "The Best Day"  of my life. 


Friday, December 1, 2017

A note to my Sadie June on her FIRST Birthday.

It seems like just yesterday your Dad and I were strolling the aisles of CVS, trying to kill time and calm nerves before heading to the hospital for my induction to have YOU.  It was November 30th, your due date.

We planned an evening at the Plaza full of wonderful food and a "stroll" thru the lights.  I'm not sure why I thought I was capable of "strolling" at this point in my pregnancy with you.  Hell, I had contemplated getting one of those motorized chairs the last few weeks of my pregnancy.

Since my pre planned stroll was most definitely not happening, CVS sounded like a good pit stop instead.  Dad stocked up on Oreos.  Me, well I picked myself up some chapstick.

That super soft, Baby Lips stuff Maybelline makes. Man, I loved that chapstick until your big sister pulled it out of the tube and smashed it a few days after you were born.

You have been the calm in our crazy this past year. 

You are so, so easy going unless someone tries to pry a toy of your liking from your fierce death grip you seem to have.  Unfortunately, your sister has attempted to do just that quite a few times over the past year.  But you, Sadie June, hold your own.  And I totally dig that about you. 

At the same time, you let her tackle you and tickle you endlessly.  The sound of you girls giggling is literally the best sound I've ever heard.

 I find myself fiercely protecting you due to your sweet demeanor, but then I witness one of your mini temper tantrums and realize you'll have no problem protecting yourself. 

I laugh at the fear I felt when learning you were a girl.  I thought it not possible to love another girl, but dang, I was so wrong. I love you endlessly.  You were everything I didn't know I needed. 

Image may contain: 1 person, sitting

You have brought so much joy to our lives, with those dimples and those two wittle teeth now poking thru your bottom gums. There is literally nothing cuter than your sweet little grin.

I thought your big sister would not adjust well to sharing her world with you, but quite the contrary.  Much to our surprise, she loves you more than she loves us! 

She calls you her chicken nugget. In fact, last week she sang happy birthday to you....instead of using your actual name, she plugged in the words, "happy birthday my chicken nugget," and I thought my heart was going to explode.

You are crazy about your dad, hell both of you girls are.... 

But Sadie June, really love your mommy and you're not afraid to show it.  You scream bloody murder when I take one step out of your eyesight. 

But listen here, I'll take every last ounce of the love you have for me, because someday you'll run out the front door hollering bye to me as you hop in the car with a boy.

Your first love, perhaps. 

And my heart will ache out of fear knowing that no one will possibly take care of you the way I have.  It will feel as if my own heart has just skipped out the front door.  Someday, when you're a mom, you'll realize that your children walking around is like your very own heart walking around outside your chest, out in the great big world.

You girls carry my heart with you every moment of everyday.

When you hurt, I'll hurt deeper.  When you cry, I'll cry harder.  When you're happy, my joy will be even more bountiful. 

So like I said, for now, I'll soak up every last ounce of the love you have for me. I'll take the crocodile tears you shed when I walk out of the room.  Because someday, I won't be able to swoop you up in my arms and kiss your sweet, chunky cheeks coated in wet tears.

In an instant, all is right in your world again. But little did you know, the moment you were born, my precious Sadie June, you made everything right in my world

Happy FIRST Birthday to our precious chicken nugget.


Sunday, November 19, 2017


Well look at me.  Blogging twice in one week?!

I figured after the last post, I'd lighten it up a bit. 

When we bought our home a few years ago, one of the top things on my wishlist was a playroom near our living space.  I'm OCD about a few things, and toys laying around my living room is one of them. 

Yes, I've heard all the quotes about "letting them be little," and "embracing the fingerprints on the walls," as well as my favorite, "putting the laundry down, leaving the toys strewn all about and just play with your kids."

Toy chest made by Grandpa!

Well, listen here.  I'm a better mom when the chaos is contained. And my kids have clean panties.  So thanks for the advice, but I'll never be able to "embrace" stepping on play-doh or sharp blocks as I walk across my kitchen, or not doing laundry for more than a week. 

When it was just Lara, the thrown together playroom in the pictures below worked fine.  We had a massive TV cabinet where I stuffed away most of the junk and a toy chest.  As time went on, the TV cabinet became a catch all for toys we needed to get rid of, not for actually storing a television. 

So off it went, and off we went to Ikea. 

Playroom Before

For less than $300, we now have a playroom that mom and kids can enjoy because every toy is organized because every toy has a spot.  

I'll link some of my favorite items in the event you're looking to organize your play space this winter! 

  IKEA Dog Tail Hook

 IKEA Toy Trunk Storage
 IKEA Kids Toy Storage Trunk 

 IKEA Metal Wire Photo Hanger

 IKEA White Ledge Shelf 

Pandora Disney Music all day, every day on this nifty little Bluetooth speaker. 

The best gifts are homemade gifts!  Made for Lara by a dear friend for her first birthday


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