You need Xanax to Drive Through Colorado

11 hours later....My mom and I finally arrived to my humble abode here in the midwest.  No, there are no longer beautiful snow capped mountains outside my window....but hey, I do have a couple bushes in the front yard.  I mean, if I had a choice, I would totally choose my view of scraggly thorn clad nasty bush crap anyway over ski slopes. 
As we were journeying over the river and thru the woods on our way back to Kansas...I got to thinking about how horrifying Colorado street signs are. 
As if it's not SCARY ENOUGH driving on a narrow windy road up and down the side of a massive mountain at 5 a.m in PITCH BLACK DARKNESS....the city of Colorado decided to throw in a few of these:

I mean, what the hell am I going to do if an avalanch occurs while I'm driving down the side of a mountain?  I'm going to die a traumatic death that will likely involve freezing to death in my car under a mountain of snow, trying to survive as long as possible on diet coke and a couple shots of Captain Morgan I had left in a small cooler in the backseat.  Why warn  me? 
Oh, and they get better....

Seriously? 

Oh, I'm driving up a hill? 
You'd think these signs were made for Snooki.

I mean, she was a vet tech so she knows how to handle a UTI.